Tuesday, January 30, 2007
ToDaY iS sUcH a DaY.... mY HeaRt SiNkS fOrEveR.
There are times where the truth may hurt so much, that I chose to run away.Today is such a day...
There are times where I have so much to say, yet silence seems my safest bet. So I kept quiet.Today is such a day...
There are times when it feels like a million tears have fallen.Times when despair threatens to swallow my soul.Times when I'm so lost, yet it is so hard to break free.Today is such a day...
There are times where my heart sinks forever with a mere frown on your face.Today is such a day...
There are times where there no longer is a simple answer to any questions.Today is such a day...
There are times where I have so much on my mind that I hardly know my thoughts anymore.Today is such a day...
There are times when my heart takes a step forward and I hear rationale screaming "Back out".Today is such a day...
There are times where love becomes a bottomless well, and I am drowned.Today is such a day...
There are times when I turn to leave, only to realise I have long placed both feet in.Today is such a day...
There are times when the future looks so bleak, but I have never stop hoping...Today is such a day...
There are many, many times when just watching you is one of my greatest joy.Today is such a day...
There are times when missing you gets more than toxic.Today is such a day...
Yet, there are also times when love gets stuck in my throat.Today is such a day...Today, I am wishing for a million stars to shine upon your dreams... Sleep Tight.
9:17 PM
Monday, January 29, 2007
无聊小泡影 (4)
常常会听到别人说： “啊，我已经好久好久没 XXXX 了。。。”我好想问问看， 他的“好久好久”， 到底有多久？
老爷爷回顾往事， 20年的光阴是好久。
对在等待的急性子来说， 一分钟的等待也算是好久。
一段拉扯的关系， 一年是好久。。。
未放在心上的朋友， 5年没见过面， 倒也不像有那么久。
一对彼此憎恨的冤家， 30年不见面， 其实一点也不会久。
可对一对热恋中的情人而言， 一天不见面也实在是太久了！
那请问。。。 您的好久， 到底有多久？
10:49 PM
17HouRs & CoUntinG dOwN...
My Maths Quiz is coming in another 17 hours and I have barely started studying for it. So to admit, I had been very very LAZY.Time seems to be ticking away at double its usual speed. Just watching the clock now is so scary.What's worse is, I guess I've sank myself deep in the misery of anticipated failure, with seemingly no intentions of breaking free from its blues. Maybe I really should get up and start working harder? But then again, either routes seems bounded on the same predictment... So, nah... I would rather have the easier way out.Boy... I am so dead this time round.... And again.
12:41 AM
Thursday, January 25, 2007
i aM nOt cRaViNg fOr FoOd nOw... nOpE, i aM NOT cRaviNg!!! NoNo...
Bleh... Yes... I am SO craving for FOOD now... Chocolates, Potato Chips, Chunky Double Chocolate Chip Cookies Double-Cheese Burgers, Seaweeds, Sushi, Korean Cold Noodles, DimSum, Claypot Braised Tofu, Fresh Oysters, Curry FishHead, satay, Oyster Omelette, Carbonara Pasta... and more Chocolates!!! The list never ends... I'm even craving for peanuts! I cant believe this... I don't usually eat peanuts :O(Oh GOSH. Bad Bad BAD...!Please do shut up now, stupid Brain! Flashing images of mouth-watering FOOD is NOT helping me stop the cravings. As if I am not fat enough already. I bought a weighing scales yesterday just to remind myself what a glutton I am fast becoming. Consequences, consequences... Come on, don't you care about consequences at all? It not just about expanding the waistline or looking chubbier ok? Its about the loads of clothes you are going to waste by gaining even another inch more of extra FATs! Its about Cost-Saving, and Resource Management!!!Just think about that packet of fries, the cup of oh-so-sweet Barley and huge plate of Fried Kuay Teow you shared with your friends today. Oh, and the mouthful of butter-dripping-fats-coated chicken rice you sneaked into your mouth before leaving for school! Ultra Ultra Sinful!!! And that deep-fried sardine puff you had during your lecture-break, now that was literally soaked in oil!! Damn it, and what about that box of Fried Chicken Cheese Sticks from Burger King for lunch?? That must have been at least a thousand calorie added already!!! *Faints* And for God's sake, lets not forget the packet of chips you just had 5 hours ago!! Hopeless.... Totally hopeless...Stupid cravings, stupid brain... U are so NOT getting your wish!But, ArgH...!! My self-control is diminishing fast...! Bleh................Maybe... Do you think maybe, indulging in just one teeenny-weeenny-itsy-bitsy piece of chocolate would not hurt that much???? No??Sigh... *Shakes Head*I should just go and sleep now.
5:43 AM
Wednesday, January 24, 2007
DeaD bLoG
My blog is really getting too boring. Just reading it is enough to make my eyes roll out of their sockets and have a few cobwebs spinned in their place. My brain is dead. My skull has hollowed out.You really shouldn't be reading anymore.Just look what I have written for the past month. I couldn't bring myself to read further than 3 entries. Repeated clusters of junk... School, relationships and what-nots. Is my life really that boring? So unhappenning!!!! Maybe I should just quit planting nonsense on the internet all together.Ahhhhhhhhhhh...............!!!!!!! DAMN BORED.Oh... The only interesting thing if any that happened today.... Watson's is having an Up-To-30% off. Quick everyone, Grab ur bags!!!
6:16 AM
Tuesday, January 23, 2007
不是理智吗？
分手，我以为是很理智的。
一直以为他也是这么想的。。。
我们不是说好的吗？
那是理智，不是任性。
我一直很坚持的去相信。
所以当我看到他在网络上写下的心情时，我真的有些惊讶。
难道分开不是因为彼此了解吗？
他还在伤心吗？
他会勇敢吗？
一直都那么好的他，我真的不愿意让他难过。
但事到如今，我们都只能往前走。。。
要理智。 要幸福。
5:18 AM
Monday, January 22, 2007
iNaCtiVe...
Gosh...! I have not blog in a week! A WEEK... A neither stressful nor chaotically busy week. Have I finally grown out of blogging?? Or perhaps there are too much things that I can't share here about my recent focuses, so I don't really know what to blog about anymore.What would you do if saying the truth will hurt someone? I always thought the best way to avoid such a scenario must be to keep whatever best remain unknown unrevealed. Yet by keeping mum, would I unintentionally magnify the degree of distress caused eventually? And it appears that I may already have. Yet neither denying nor admitting seems feasible options for me now. Many times, I really wonder if I am doing the right thing at all. But by now, I guess its no longer up to me to decide.I did Ting's hair and make-up for a wedding dinner last Saturday. I have absolutely zero talent in this area. Only realizing it the minute I sat her down in front of the mirror was most untimely. It turns out to be a disasterous flop. Up to the point where I started spraying her hair, I had the faintest idea of what I was doing. I could not decide on her hair-do or make-up colours. That must have been the worst possible way to start. What did people say about Bad Omens?I had major problems trying to style her hair properly. I really can't believe I couldn't even do something as simple as a french twist. My last minute practices poking on her poor scalp certainly give her bruises I guess, yet the result was nothing near passable. I even got us in a frantic rush for time. All expectations eventually bundled up into a sub standard hair-do, a sub-standard make-up and major frustrations in our haste. Nevertheless, she still thanked me for the revolting mess I've created. Yes, that did probably plunge me into further guilt. I hope she had fun during the dinner despite her ghastly makeover experience with me.Anyway, other than the usual slacking, I have not been doing anything constructive recently. Its third week into the new semester and I have to admit I have not been studying. And soon the homeworks and quizzes will start to rolling in. *Gap*This is Pure Misery.I need some chocolates... Now.
5:55 AM
Monday, January 15, 2007
DiD i saY i HaD nOthiNg tO bLoG aBouT??
I seems to have nothing much to blog about lately. Yah, school had started, workload are coming in... but that is so yesterday's news. Oh... Now that's probably why life feels monotonous all of a sudden.The only major fluctuations I have been experiencing recently are probably only emotionally. I am not quite comfortable about indepth blogging on this part of me up here in the "open". And for some reasons I'd rather not talk about this now. So sharing is NOT permitted. But dear friends, rest assure that it is nothing upsetting :o) Hmm...I am so missing my friends. I guess when life slows down, we do have more time to be sentimental. Jac, Tian, Xian and Empress, better meet up soon ok? Meet up before you have me cursing and swearing with tons of misses till you drop your sneezy noses!!Oh, I just changed my mobile plan yesterday! I was using M1's Ultimate plan since like forever, and it was fine until recently the horrible chatterbox in me unwittingly doubled the bill! So I had it changed it to the Student Plan. Whew, luckily I was still well within its age-limit condition to sign up for it. This mobile plan must be like God-sent!The only downs are, I've been downgraded from 2000mins talktime to a pathetic 150mins a month and I lost my loyalty discount. Losing these were painful, I assure you. Sob... But on the brighter side. there is this whole chunk of benefits that I can't even comprehend --- That's youngster's stuff, and I'm undeniably passe. Gee... What I did catch was that now I have "whole day FREE incoming calls" and an allowance of 1000 sms per month! And what's neater is, I get to call 3 M1 numbers for FREE! Yes, FREE!! And IF I do not fancy these in months to come, I can always swop my benefits to free dialling in my campus. All these for a quarter of the price of my former Ultimate plan. How cool is that!Did I say being a student is GREAT? Haha!! Ok... Maybe I should wait till my next mobile bill arrives before I say this again... Bleh... Actually I was quite tempted to convert my existing number to a pager. Yes, PAGER. And yes, I am aware that that is like old school technology already. But I guess everyone who knows me knows too that I am seriously lacking the habit of replying messages, returning calls or even picking up calls. Laziness maybe a reason. Forgetfulness maybe another... Or perhaps for certain other reasons, I just don't fancy doing all these. My mobile phone like is my key to the outside world, a key I definitely can't do without. Yet as much as friends conquer majority of my thoughts and as much as I adore being with my friends, sometimes I'd feel that having a mobile robs away the quietness and privacy that I so often need. And sadly over time, it occasionally becomes an annoyingly demanding tool that I detest. When people make approaches to contact, they naturally expect the other party to response... and response FAST enough. A reasonable obligation, no doubt about that. Yet every often and to be honest... pretty apologetically, I'd fail to meet up with such expectations. Needless to say, it is inevitable that some buzzing at the ear stresses my next attempt to make contact, coupled with some quick explanations to make, and perhaps even a white lie or two to go with it. I cannot blame anyone but myself at this point on why didn't I apply for a pager instead?But seriously thinking, I don't think I can ever do without a mobile phone and I am not going to stupidly waste money on another pager. So I guess the next time anyone asks me for my number, I am just going to tell him/her my mobile number, garnished with a little fabrication that its actually just a pager line.And to all who already knows, just pretend from now on that I REALLY am holding a pager, ok? Hahaha.Wow, this is quite a long entry... Did I just say that I have nothing much to blog about lately?? Hehe.
11:06 AM
Saturday, January 13, 2007
无知
没有了安全感。。。 在我了解自己如此无知后。
要怎能不糊思乱想 。。。
3:11 AM
Friday, January 12, 2007
ScHoOL sTaRTs...
School started yesterday... Bleh... But it was really nice to see a lecture-hall filled with uni-mates again! Especially nice to see the girls!
I know I must work hard this semester and every semester thereafter. All that need to be let go off and all fun that I needed to have have been over and done with in the past month. Yet part of mi just keep lingering back to the fun-filled Dec-2006, where I lost my regular senses and conventional self-discipline. Part of me just refuse to wake up, yet. You know how sometimes you may feel an Angel and a Devil playing Tug-A-War at both ends of your either limbs? That is exactly how I feel now. Determination is not winning the battle, yet.
I have to emphasize on "yet" twice, because I know very well that too often, reality leaves us with no choice but to abide by it orders. I am fully aware that my playfulness is not something that reality or my rational self can sensibly condone. So, *Sigh*... WAKE UP NOW!!! *Knocks my Walnut-Head thrice!*
Oh, on a happier note, I must blog about my shopping trophies from my short KUL trip on the last few days of the semester break. I am a very Happy Shopaholic now, and had been very kindly crowned the Shopping Diva by by holiday-buddies. Oh my, if only they had seen my usual-shopaholic-self at work... Haha.
On top of being fascinated by the bulk of items I can buy in such a short time, I am totally blown off by their low prices, and how quality need not be sacrificed! I think we should have "regional" shopping trips more often ya? Hehe.
Nice things must be shared, right? Here are some of my favourite buys, converted to Singapore Dollars!
Chocolate Fondue Set (SGD 17.50) 
A simple porcelain-ware like this can so often be overpriced locally.
Denim Short Skirt (SDG 11) & Embroidered 3/4 Jeans (SGD 24)
Blue Tube (SGD 21.50) & Brown Spaghetti Cotton Top (SDG 17)
Blue Spaghetti Top from Mango (SGD 9), White Belt (SGD 6) & Grey Top from Zara (SGD 13)
White Stripped Dress (SDG 39)
Little Black Dress with Fabric Detail (SGD 24)
Brown Leather Bag from Tangs Studio @ 50% Off!!! (SGD 39)
12:29 AM
Sunday, January 07, 2007
WeDDinGs & ReSoLutiOnS
This entry is so overdue... I'm going for a short trip tomorrow, so thought I better post this up before I forget about it!My blog is seriously lagging from an overload of slides! I have either been too busy or too tired to do anything about it, and I shall quite thoughtlessly add on to its snail-speed downloading with more slides from the 2 weddings I attended on the last two days of 2006.Shermaine's Wedding Dinner Its really nice to meet up with my batch girls again. The whole evening was so grand and romantic!!! Her husband performed jamming and singing. Our hearts literally melted at his perfomance! Gladdees Solemnization Ceremony on New Year's Eve! So happy to meet up my teamies again!!! Kelly-san has a New Year's Resolution, to stop drinking. While I can't exactly see how that is going to happen... but well, as everyone is going to "belittle" her determination, I guess I will just TRY to have enough faith in her. Go Go 加油, Kelly-san!!! Just thinking alone is good effort already! Hehe. New Year and its resolutions... Do they always have to come together as a package? Mine don't. The last time I had one as a welcoming start to a fresh year must have been in my kindergarden years. I have long since learnt that they don't work. Nope. But now that everyone seems to be talking about theirs, I thought I had better start thinking about mine too. If it was about getting a wishlist, I could have easily filled it up with twelve dozens yearnings, no less. But having a resolution is not as simple as wishing for something to happen. It means making something happen out of pure effort right? Maybe for a start, I should start sleeping at the right hours. Now, why does that seems so hard?By the way, School is starting in less than a week's time...Spared from the common slogging from work, I would not deny that I had been well enjoying life last month, and doing pretty much nothing constructive. Yet amidst all the fun and new-found freedom, life seemed to have creeped to a point of saturation. Bleh... Why is my mind is always in conflicts?Part of me craves to return to the brutal embrace of a new stress-filled semester, and let life return to "norm". Yet the other part of me dreads the "norm" because I know irregardless of how many zillion times I'd promised myself to strive harder, I still have valid suspicions that I would not. My serious lack of determination is killing my optimism.
12:51 AM
Friday, January 05, 2007
有一天 我的心情生病了。。。
吃了一整晚的感冒药 身体还是觉得焖焖的，
不管怎样都睡不好 却又说不出是哪里不妥。
是我的心情生病了吗？
像是掉进了深水里 静静溺死一样。
一切很平静 最后连挣扎都没有了。。。
好久不见的感觉啊 我几乎早已经遗忘了。
原来时间的长短 不是衡量难过的关键。
是我太低估你了。
一直很任性的我 只想做你身边的乖猫。
这实在离谱得 连自己都觉得很可笑。
4:40 AM
Thursday, January 04, 2007
无聊小泡影 (3)
来维持一段婚姻 或一段感情，
我们并不需要很爱彼此。。。
其实重要的只是要懂得如何和睦相处，安守本份而已。
这应该是随着年龄该懂的事吧？
可是人怎么总是那么容易忘了理智？
不懂事。。。
8:22 AM
Wednesday, January 03, 2007
无聊小泡影 (2)
爱的最后结剧 必定是分离吧 ?
若要说真有不同 . . .
大概唯一的不同 只有谁走得比谁早而以 . . .
9:34 AM
