There's hardly anything to blog about nowsaday. Or rather, I guess there's hardly anything I am comfortable about blogging nowsaday. Ok, I know I am done lamenting about this in the previous entrieSSSSS.
I was always quite open about majority of my daily life. But recently my tolerance for so-called privacy-sharing seems to be facing major a overhaul. Suddenly I do NOT want the whole world to know what I am thinking or doing. I can no longer hold a proper conversation with anyone who conspires to hear a piece of my personal life. I even find it very difficult to talk about my daily happenings. I was even considering to abandon this blog, since I can no longer bare my soul in it. Whatever happened to me?!!
Now, I am not even comfortable about people asking me seemingly minor stuff like where did I go, with who and for what. There's really no point in asking me the nitty gritty things of today, yesterday and tomorrow. Why do you want to know? I don't ask what did you have for lunch, with who and when, or post questions like what makes up your family and its history, or worse, interrogate you on your relationships and your dates --- For that similar basis, you really do not need to know mine. It simply sums up to mutual respect for each other's privacy, so please respect mine. Now which part of that was difficult to understand?
For reasons currently unknown to me, I really do get very very irritated when mere acquaintances try to probe too much into my issues now. I guess if I'm comfortable about sharing, I will. I will talk about it somehow when I am ready, which clearly means NOT NOW. I really hate it if I have to uncontrollably frown at you, because I am torn between the unwillingness to disclose my issues and the equal unwillingness to be rude by not answering you. Ironic to my recent depleted level of patience, I am not a usually rude person, so in the end I always feel I am being forced to contribute far more than I really take pleasure in. Total resentments!!
I am aware that this is not a good sign. It seems like I am not really being very reasonable here. Either time have totally twisted my perceptions or I am fast becoming an unfriendly person. "Either" is not a good word here too. As in this case, its extremely frustrating in itself not to understand myself anymore. I am withholding alot of anger within me over this and I can see it accumulating. Getting really short-tempered. ARGH.
I really hope this is just a passing phrase in my quarter-century years. Dear friends, apologies if I had been rude to you lately -- like I just did when I "SORT OF" told a couple off in my class, though they were the ones being irritating if I have to give you my honest opinions (it really doesn't matter if I might already be bias over previous issues) So, if you are not like well-loved by me (which obviously my friends are), seriously, don't step on me now, or be prepared to hear me snap, bite and ROAR.
