I'm more tired than I was yesterday, I'm beginning to resemble a panda. Congratulate me... I must have upgraded myself to become a National Treasure of PRC.
And its freaky how my body keeps screaming for food... "More More More!!". My growing enormous appetite is just so scary. Breakfast, lunch and dinner are just not enough. It seems like only BBQ potato chips and loads of chocolate can do the trick. Oh no... Bad Sign. My figure's going out of shape soon... Well, not as if I had one to begin with anyway. Opps.
I also have a huge craving for eggs, which is something that I don't even normally eat. I wonder how long does it take for 3-eggs-a-day to kill someone with high cholesterol? Someone please remind me to exercise some self control!
12:21 AM
Tuesday, May 29, 2007
FiRsT DaY oF wORk......
I'm so TIRED.........!!!!!!
12:39 AM
Sunday, May 27, 2007
SoLd....
I've found an administrative job on Friday and will be starting work on Monday, less that 30 hours away... I can't believe how fast everything is happening. I'm seriously unprepared, my quest for the job search had only started about a week ago.
I heard alot from the boss about how bad the hours can get. Even normal working hours alone will eat into my class schedules. And my friends thinks that my salary is like LITTLE -- actually I thought it was pretty alright, considering I had neither experience nor the appropriate academic qualification in the field. Even with all the "NO"s swimming in my mind, I managed to brainlessly print my signature to sell away 6mths or more of my life to that local bank. SOLD!!!
The optimistic part of me thinks hopefully this may fill up the void that I have been experiencing for the past year. But another part of me is seriously having second thoughts. Am I really ready? Isn't everything happening too fast? Is this a wise choice? Will I be able to adapt in a big organization, facing the same boss n colleagues day in day out? What about my studies? I really hope I can cope. ><
Wish me luck!!! Lots and Lots of luck!!!
Oh by the way, I've got my exam results today! Ok, as a matter of fact, yesterday. Boy, I was so nervous! I passed all three modules! Yippee! About the grades... Hmm. I guess I'd rather not talk about it. The important thing is I passed the modules, isn't it? Never mind the grades! That is enough reason for a celebration already.
As usual, at this time I would say.... "Oh, I better buck up on the next semester and blah blah blah...", I may even set an aim for the next semester. But knowing me, I wonder when am I actually going to fufill my words? Sigh. Forget it.
No aim, no markers, just go straight.
3:52 AM
Wednesday, May 23, 2007
cHaNGes & mY LiTtLe Coach BaG!!!
U would have already noticed that I've change my blog-skin! Finally.... Yippee!!
Was getting terribly sick of my previous ultra-hot-pink template. Too much pink just reminds me of puke, I don't know why. Well, this template still looks very pink, but overall it spots a much lighter pastel shade. Apart from having my narcissism knocking furiously at ur face, I guess the entire page just looks less sickening to me. I hope the changes makes reading more bearable.
I know it looks very plain compared to the last blog-skin. My creativity is very limited nowsaday. I suppose age is really catching up. But, this is afterall my first attempt in designing a blog-skin (I'll call the previous skin template-planning), so u have to give me some credits for it -- even though I didn't "draw" the little fairy! Haha, I sound so demanding! Well if u try "painting" the wallpaper with the basic software "Paint", u'll appreciate that amount of hard work... ><
I changed the song too. Yes, u must be glad, I know. I liked the song alot but hearing it for so many times just makes me very tempted to wham my head against the wall. I'd still like to have music playing here, so in its place I've embedded a playlist of some of my favourite songs with Shuffle-mode enabled. Variety huh. Enjoy!!
Oh by the way, I finally managed to collect my little Coach Bag from Kelly-san's place last night! That's like after a month since she helped me hunt it down from the States. I simply love it! Thanks Kelly-san!!
My little Coach Bag.... I LOVE U!!!
6:53 AM
Tuesday, May 22, 2007
BoReDom.......... SIGH.
I am so bored. The cycle repeats over and over again... Or rather I guess it had never end ever since I packed my kebaya into my wardrobe.
Boredom fills my whole miserable life. *Weep* I know how people always complain that they are suffocated by stress, or by work etc. They reckon that I am lucky to be able to give up work for studies, and that I should indulge myself in this "freedom". But why do I feel so suffocated by boredom? There's nothing much to do everyday. Nothing much to feel excited about either. It says alot if I can finish drooling over two korean and one taiwanese darma series in just a week. I am just growing into a Gigantic Potato and very soon, you'll see sprouts on my airy head too. Comparatively, the much-torturous exam period some two weeks ago seems much more meaningful. Extremely undesirable but definitely much much more meaningful.
I need something to do! I prefer finding a job. I suppose there are alot of considerations to make especially when the next semester holds 3 killer subjects. Leave issues alone could kill alot of brain cells, should I work. A suicidal move? Perhaps? ....Gee, yes most likely. But I am so itching for some motivation in life! Well, work can hardly be called motivation, I know. Yet I guess sometimes motivation do come in the forms of responsibilities and discipline too. If others can do it, why not me? Hmm... then again, my brain is hardly half as good as theirs.... SIGH. Procastination.
The exam result would be released in about 5 days. I mentioned that I did not put in much effort this semester. So its little wonder why I am getting so jittery over it now. In fact, just talking about it now gives me butterflies in my stomach and makes my heart beat ridiculously. Damn nervous >< Argh.
The irritating part is, why does the results release date have to fall on the day after the Great Singapore Sales starts??! I've been storing $M-power$ over the last two months for this GreatShopping Spree, I had even surveyed and scribbled my shopping list! But I guess I probably wouldn't enjoy it as much now. I am already feeling this much stress over my results now, I don't think the stress will be any less just a day before the bomb drops... How can I shop in peace???!!!! Oh Horrid Horrid Horrid!
2:34 AM
Friday, May 18, 2007
Having a strong mind to Back Out. Stop me.
4:29 PM
Thursday, May 17, 2007
FiNaLLy caN pOst!!!
YEAH!!!!!!!!!!! I finally can post!
Eversince my last entry I was unable to post any more new entry :o( Blogger keeps giving an error message whenever I click on "New Post". That explains my absence.
Well, I've recovered! Thanks for your concern, Jac! You are always my second pillow, hehe. And thanks to all my friends who asked as well. Blur me forgot to change my "Sick Sick Sick" MSN nick when I recovered, I guess I worried quite a few friends.... Gee, opps sorry.
Anyway, I've already started on my special term. The course is quite interesting, almost like brief pyschology sessions. Its really refreshing to looking at people management with new concepts. But the term paper is gonna be a headache. And the group presentation as well, I don't know about the other members but I'm really not gifted in writing non-technical stuff. Arrgh...
The worse part is not about writing or presenting, but that 70% of our grades will be based on in-course assessment. Dead. I'm not someone who is that keen on giving opinions in public. Totally unlike what people will expect from an ex-cabin-crew, I know. I am seriously shy and quiet among strangers. Really! I hope I don't get a fat zero manz...
2:09 AM
Sunday, May 06, 2007
讨厌生病
病好几天了啦 =（
我快受不了了。。。 身体好像快不行了。
到底几时才会好？？
-
说起生病， 大家都会问我看医生了吗？
对，我不乖。
我没看。
我真的不喜欢看医生啦。。。
不看医生就真的不能好吗？
-
我不是在逞强。
偶尔真的觉的好像好些了。。。
大概多休息会有帮助吧？
-
好讨厌生病。
马上好起来可以吗？
-
祝自己 早日康复。。。
2:58 AM
Friday, May 04, 2007
JingPing's WeDDinG & FLaBs.... AHem. MY FLaBs.
Finally..... My super duper outdated humble contribution on JingPing's Wedding. Yes, very very late. I know.
Yup, I look FAT. I've gained flabs, lots of it in fact. The pictures are good enough proof. I've scrutunized through each and every magnified inch of the pictures, so I definitely know. So... NO, you really do NOT need to rub it in. Bleh... I should have gotten that digitally magical program called Photoshop.
The reason I mentioned FLABS and not WEIGHT is because I have not gained any of the latter if you are interested to know. Not even 100g. Somehow, miraculously I just look FAT. My body mass and its outook has never tallied. I don't know why, don't ask me.
Well, while I am at this, I might as well conveniently mention that what every girl needs is really a Sweet-Talker. It doesn't matter what they say or what I've said. Every guy should know well enough we seldom mean what we say. We say the things we do to make you feel better and essentially, to make us feel better about you being such a dimwit.
I guess it must be my outmost misfortune to be stuck with one that speaks nothing but the truth and the whole truth... Emphasized, Amplified and Repeated. In my opinion, "Hey you look FAT." is definitely not a great way to start a date. And "Your arms are so FLABBY" is really a horrible way to end one too. And man, the way he said it! He almost looked like he has done me a big favor by saying the unspeakable.
At that moment, I imagined knoocking him out with a merciless killer swing of my "flabby" arm. I struggled with great effort to fight the temptation to deaf his ears with a, "Hey, SHUT UP! You skinny bag of bones!". My insides are thunder-storming but as usual all I could eventually muster up is an idiotic smile at an equally idiotic bright-eyed creaure. FISH.
I know it sounds really bimbotic to say this, but I can get fiercely materialistic over verbal commpliments. Yes, it is not difficult for us to distinguish between the fake and the real. But even so, the fakies can be still sweet to the ears, and the real.... well, they are simply an extra bonus. In short, the average girl's ears doesn't hurt abit to hear both. Its like chocolate to the ears. So give us whole truckload of them. Extra sweet and more toppings please.
1:59 PM
Thursday, May 03, 2007
eXaMs OveR!!!
The exams are OVER!!!!!!!!!!!!
A wonderful cause for celebration!! Well, at least before we get our results............. >< But I'm sick... again... How untimely.
I didn't study much for the papers, I wouldn't be surprise if I failed them. But frankly, I can't really be too bothered if I did fail. Maybe I'l weep a day or too... But the point is, I guess I wouldn't be too devastated. Afterall, its the excellent excuse to pull my butt out of this entire contradiction of interest. It meant I can start looking for another contradiction of interest, as usual.
My special term module starts next week. Afterwhich if I'm not wrong, I'll be "entitled" to a month of semester break before the next semester starts in August. I'd better look for a part-time job within this period. The boredom that I went through on my last semester break was really torturous, my life went upside down.
Anyway, I will be taking Business-related module, not Industrial Management like almost everyone else. But I'm so envious of their timetable! Lectures on 1-2 days a week, not a 3-day-per-week like mine. I wonder why I made a different choice. Its a mild attempt to debate my desire to diverge out of the chemical and engineering field in the future. Then again, it makes me rethink why am I in this course then. Another contradiction of interest. Gosh.
Sometimes I like to think that I am clear-headed and have control over the direction that my life is heading. But if I think enough, I guess I have to admit I am way way way out of control. Why do I always chose to do the "right" things for the so-called "better" future and ignore the agony I'm forcing myself through in the process?
Eventually, will I be leading the life that I want or just be living an eternal state of confusion where, "Oh, this is what I'm doing, but its not really what I want to do." I've got enough of countless replicates of that situation.
GRR....
Oh, it occurs to me that this is my first entry in 2 weeks. Really, I didn't meant to grumble.
